Polish Divorce

A Polish man married a Canadian girl after he had been
in Canada a year or so and, although his English was
far from perfect, they got on very well. Until one day
he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he
could arrange a divorce for him-"very quick. " The
lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would
depend on the circumstances and asked him the following
questions:
LAWYER: Have you any grounds?
POLE: JA, JA, an acre and half and a nice little home
with 3 bedrooms.
LAWYER "No," I mean what is the foundation of this
case?"
POLE: "It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," he
responded.
LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
POLE: "No," he replied, "We have a two-car carport and
have never really needed one."
LAWYER: "I mean, What are your relations like?"
POLE: "All my relations are in Poland."
LAWYER: "is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLE: "Yes, we have hi fidelity stereo set &DVD player
with 6.1 sound. We don't necessarily like the music,
but the answer to your questions is yes."
LAWYER: No, I mean Does your wife beat you up?
POLE: NO, I'm always up before her.
LAWYER: is your wife a nagger?
POLE: NO, she white.
LAWYER: WHY do you want this divorce?
POLE: SHE going to kill me.
LAWYER: What makes you think that?
POLE: I got proof.
LAWYER: What kind of proof?
POLE: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the
drug store and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read --
it says, "Polish Remover."